School Reunion - Do you primp or go natural?

My high school reunion is coming up this month. There are a handful of people I'd really like to see, plus more whose posts on facebook have me curious. They seem real, fulfilled, down-to-earth. They've either learned a lot in 25 years, like I feel I have, or I didn't really know them in high school. It must be both.

I told my friend about this event. I'm flying back to my hometown and the reunion is on the first weekend. My friend is an expert hairdresser. She has decided that I am going to have shiny, silky hair, with fantastic highlights and a great haircut.

I love the pampering. I enjoy hanging out with my friend, who I've known for less than a year, since we moved to our new house in New Jersey. I love that she loves her profession. And she's so good at it.

So does this mean I'm primping for this reunion, even if my hair looks “natural” when I attend?

I made a mistake at the last reunion. I didn’t do anything with my hair. Instead I bought a new two piece top in a color I never wore. I wanted something different and very current.

I got it.

But I didn't feel myself the whole night and I believe it showed in my conversation. I felt as nervous as a teenager again.

What is it about a class reunion that makes us crazy? We want to cover the grey, do away with the wrinkles and love handles, and present the most perfect version of ourselves we have at the moment. Why? Precisely because we've only seen them twice since we were 17. We want the comment, "she hasn't aged a bit," even though 25 years of amazing wisdom and learning has been tacked on to our bodies and minds since then.

So if I really am 25 years wiser, why can't I look 25 years older?

This time I'm determined to have as much fun, with as much confidence as I have in my normal life. Even though I'm sinking back into a room full of people I've seen twice since I was barely 17, I'm determined to be "me," comfortable, with all the wisdom and smart decisions that have brought me to the life I live today.

I find it ironic: I shouldn't have to take extra effort to plan how I look if I'm confident in my current life, should I?

One day I'll have to come to terms with my aging body, but I'm not going to do it this month. At my reunion I want to look young. I just don't want the shy, awkward feelings and flat attempts at conversations that went along with it.

The message is right in front of my nose

Articles, ezines, e-newsletters, emails... if we let ourselves, they can fill our inbox and easily overwhelm us.

I was starting to feel that way. I recently unsubscribed to many weekly messages, but still, I had more. Yet I couldn't bring myself to get rid of them all.

Then it hit me, now every time I open up my inbox, I am greeted with messages from those spreading positive messages, giving me a reason to smile, to think, to ponder.

Each message that now comes to me has a metaphysical message about the joy in life. Some speak of the energy that surrounds us. Some tell me to take a moment and focus somewhere else. Others remind me of the strong communities building with an invisible yet powerful connection. They connect through the internet, yet it feels more than that, for they remain with me throughout my day.

I didn't unsubscribe because they lift my spirit, raise my vibration, bring a spontaneous smile to my face.

I am surrounded by the power of metaphysical energy building. What a gift. And it is right in front of my nose.

The Basics of Intuitive Parenting, part 1

Intuitive parenting is our natural gift when life is unruffled. Follow our gut. Breathe. Listen to the little voice in our head. Act on our child's requests, especially when it resonates deeply.

But how do we remember to breathe or ignore our own frustrations when soccer practices, recitals and mac 'n' cheese dinners jam every waking thought?

"I'd love to find a better way to get my children to listen without yelling. I feel so busy, I don't have time to tell them twice," says Andrea, a mother of two, five and nine years old.

"My children love their after school activities - soccer, ballet, guitar, baseball - but it is too much! I feel like a bus driver, not a mother," says Sara, mother to three children.

When time is overobligated, not only do we react without thinking, we make mistakes. We don't listen to our intuition. Instead we act out of frustration, annoyance or exhaustion.

"Where is your violin?!" I said to my son after we arrived at school. Meanwhile, my thoughts were racing. "Why didn't he remember his violin? I guess I should have reminded him but I was just too busy to remember."

Does this sound familiar?

However, we can learn to be frustrated or exhausted, still be able to hear our intuition and respond with the right words or actions.

Solution

Intuition is essentially a choice. Choose the correct path or make the right decisions.

To listen to intuition - and remember to do it - start by practicallly taping your mouth shut. Post notes on the fridge, TV and computer screens, as well as the corner of the family room entrance. "Close," or "listen," are two innocuous words that may work for you.

Then use body language and your ears. Listen to your children and listen to yourself.

If you are at your wits end, you know your body feels pulled in three directions: child, self, to-do list. If you give a few minutes to your child, you may even feel rejuvenated yourself, and then you can attend to your to-do list.

In the meantime, be conscious of what your thoughts are saying.

"I'm tired!"
"I don't have time for this."

Be conscious of them, but don't act on them. When you zip your mouth closed and simply listen to yourself, you become empowered to make more conscious decisions, and more open to listen to your intuition.

"Ok. I'm tired. I may not have the energy I normally have, but it is simple tiredness."

Once you acknowledge what your thoughts are saying, you can move on.

"I am tired. I can also listen to my child by sitting down. Maybe I can even drink tea or cold water while I do that."

What do your children want? Your full attention. Stop what you are doing and sit with them while they tell you about their scraped knee on the playground, or their new art project. Give them a hug or put your hand on their shoulder. You hardly have to say a thing to give them the attention they crave.

Keep your mouth closed except for the occasional "hmmm, that sounds fun," or "tell me more."

When your mouth is closed your child gets your attention, and you may remember to "just breathe." Maybe you will forget this time, with your thoughts suddenly becoming louder and clearer, but perhaps you will remember. In the space between your thoughts, there may be one deep breath that you remember.

And that is how it starts.

Is it Intuition or Distraction?

How can you tell if information or thoughts are intuitive or merely distractions?

Check out this brief slideshow (from one of my earlier posts) and you will know the difference and be able to follow your intuition in no time!

Let me know if you have any questions too.