I happen to be a believer of survival of consciousness. I have had enough experiences to realize that there is more to life than our human body and it's mechanical actions. There is more out there than just us humans.
In fact, I believe that we are having a human experience, as part of our greater existence as souls or spirits... or as our "mind". Many of the scientists at the conference spoke of our mind, as being separate from our brain. Whatever you may call it - soul, spirit or mind - I have no doubt that we are greater than our human bodies.
And this weekend, we heard from such renowned scientists as Fred Alan Wolf on quantum physics, from Gary Schwartz on his scientifically valid experiments with mediums and from Jim Tucker on his verifiable research on reincarnation. Although the presenters didn't always agree 100% on everything, they did seem to agree on one thing: that there is more to life than what we can see with our eyes. Whether they are energy particles, spirits, ghosts, or repetitive near-death experiences, there is something more than meets the eyes. They have moved past the "does it exist" in their research and are now moving into the "how does it exist" or "how does it work" in their research. We were reminded that mainstream science worked with atoms before they could see them, and are now working at the nano-molecular level (I think I got that right) even though there is much that can't be seen.
After all the scientific talk, I came out of the conference realizing we are each a small part of a greater existence. I felt surreal as I noticed an individual walking across the street and, through a shift in my own persective, saw that she was a minute part of the energy that surrounds us. I sensed the energy around us - the humming and shifting - and could visualize those molecules becoming denser and slowing down until they form a human. I know that isn't exactly how it works, but this abstract knowing was definitely surreal.
And on a greater level, I realize that our purpose here is for our souls to learn and grow through us - this is our human potential.
And this is what gives meaning to our existence.
However, there were a couple days after the conference that, due to the science emphasis, I simply saw an etheric realm crystallizing into human form, which grows, dies and becomes etheric again. I envisioned our soul, if it even existed, as using our humanness as puppets, with no purpose for ourselves as humans. I lacked a connection with the meaning of purpose that rationally I know exists - I just wasn't feeling it. I was extremely uncomfortable, struggling to accept the process of understanding and change that I was going through, hoping that I'd come out on the other side with an appreciation for life and the afterlife, and an ability to connect the two in a meaningful way. I didn't like it, in any case.
I felt grateful that this feeling only lasted a couple days (what if it had gone on for weeks? forever? the learning, growth and understanding I'd been going through the last few years - gone?)
Then I woke up this morning and realized, perhaps there is something so unique, so incredible, so rich, that our energetic souls want nothing more than to experience their opportunities to be human, to plan, then to live out a human existence, with all its mistakes, lessons and triumphs. Perhaps there is nothing quite like this existence on the energetic plane of our souls.
Quite the turnaround...and to be honest, I'm still struggling to get back on "track" completely. I like feeling spiritually enlightened (even if I have a long way to go). I like feeling a solid sense of purpose, a feeling that every action I take has a consequence (even if I make a mistake and the consequence is unpleasant). I did a meditation last night and, for the first time in all the times I've meditated, felt a tightening all around my chest and a pain down my back. It pretty much disappeared once I was done, but... is my body still back at "no purpose in this life", while my mind is struggling to bring me forward once again?
I appreciated knowing that there is science behind what I'm learning. I appreciate that avenues of science are devoting their time, talent and knowledge to this. I believe this will help bridge a gap between mainstream audiences and metaphysical audiences. However I think, for me, I need to separate the important facts of science from the beauty that is the afterlife and beyond. At least until I'm more grounded in my own personal transformation.
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