Feeling blue? Take care of yourself – do nothing.

“No winter lasts forever; no spring skips its turn.” ~ Hal Borland

There are some days in our life when we simply feel blue. No energy. Blah. Though these days hit some of us more than others, it is important for us to recognize when it happens and try not to struggle with the expectation that we should be feeling full of energy.

We all go through a cycle of energy from time to time, and if we are aware of it, then we might be able to accept it more easily.

For me, low energy is often a sign that I’ve been doing too much and need to slow down to take care of myself. However, if I ignore this signal and keep pushing past the lack of energy, I could end up feeling sick. Or I could end up feeling so much stress that everything falls apart around me.

Or, I could end up with a lack of productivity at a time when I need to complete an assignment or task.

So when I feel low energy, I carve out time to take a break and perhaps do nothing. “Nothing” might be reading a good book, getting a pedicure or even taking a 20 minute nap in the middle of the day. 

“Nothing” might be drinking a cold glass of water while sitting out on the porch, or listening to some happy music.

Nothing certainly is something, but it never gets put on our to-do list. That might be a good idea – schedule nothing into our day. But in the meantime, our bodies have a way of telling us when we haven’t done enough of it, and give us a signal by feeling weary or blue.

Next time you feel that way, pay attention and honor your body’s signals. Then choose the nothing that makes you feel better.

Lessons in Motherhood: A Tribute to My Mom

This weekend I am traveling home to help my mother celebrate her 70th birthday. She and my father are also celebrating over 30 years in their house. They move at the end of next month. There is much to celebrate and I'm thankful to be part of it.

My mother is a role model and and a source of strength and support. Along with my father, she provided a secure childhood, and I know I was fortunate to have that. It is a foundation I learned to cherish, and now try to provide for my own children.

As a child I took my mother for granted. I expect that my own children take me for granted also. And so it should be. They need to know I will always be there for them. They need to feel safe and secure, and if they question my presence then they question their own security. As a child I had no questions. I knew I could rely on my mother for anything.

I believe this came from very clear rules and boundless love. My sister, brother and I knew what our limits were. We knew we were doing something we'd get in trouble for, even as we did it.

As an older teen, I remember coming home late on a Saturday night. It was past the time I was allowed to stay out, and cell phones didn't exist yet to let my parents know where I was if I was late. So as I walked up to the door I rehearsed my words. "We got a flat tire. I'm sorry I'm late." Once it was the truth. Once it was a convenient excuse. Of course, now I know that two flat tires don't hold much weight with a parent.

However, I recall feeling scared for the consequence, but not for my safety. My mother might take away a privilege, but she wouldn't kick me out of the house, and she would always love me. I never questioned that. Ever.

As a teenager I was also keenly aware of the level of choice I was allowed to make. When it came to new boyfriends, college choices, job choices, or other decisions that would affect my future, I was allowed to make those myself. I laugh now as I remember that if my mother was unhappy about my choice, she was eerily silent. (She doesn't often have nothing to say.) Silence was enough of an opinion that I weighed my decisions carefully. But I still made those decisions myself, and lived with the consequences, positive or negative.

Knowing clearly what my mother expected of me (hard work, care for others, respect for rules and inner strength), helped me to establish myself in the working world and into adulthood.

My children are growing, though they seem a long way from adulthood. Nevertheless I know it is important to set clear rules and provide infinite love. My mother helped me to grow into the person I am today. I learned alot from her. I hope I am giving my children the same positive, nurturing environment she gave me.

I grew up in the house we will celebrate in this weekend. People have asked me if it is difficult to see family time in that house come to an end. Maybe a little, I reply. But mostly not. When the foundation of my childhood were my strong and loving mother and father, I can  help them celebrate anywhere, even across distances, as what they gave is always with me.

Can You Risk Failure in Order to Succeed?

“I’ve missed more than nine thousand shots in my career. I’ve lost almost three hundred games. Twenty-six times, I’ve been trusted to take the game winning shot and missed. I’ve failed over and over and over again in my life. And that is why I succeed.” ~ Michael Jordan

Have you ever worked hard for something, only to have it fail? Perhaps you counted on a contract to be signed but it wasn’t, or maybe you were banking on a promotion at work and it didn’t happen. Maybe you took a final exam only to end up with a lower mark than you hoped for.

How do you deal with these “failures”?

If you are like many, you may feel disheartened, annoyed or upset. Perhaps you wish you could turn back time and do something different.

The fact is, these failures are there for a reason. They help you to learn so that you make a different choice or take a different action the next time. They help you to gain knowledge so that next time, you can be successful.

Many incredibly successful people have endured huge failures in order to get where they are. The quote above from Michael Jordan is just one example. Donald Trump went bankrupt more than once in order to get where he is today.

Sometimes there is a big risk in taking the next step towards success. Whether it involves money, time or self-esteem, it is a step that you sometimes must take. 

I don’t advocate being wreckless with your money or your self-esteem (or your parenting strategies), but if you weigh the risks, and decide you can deal with the failure (if it were to occur), then it may be worth taking the leap.

What is holding you back from great success? Can you step forward and risk even greater success?

Mother's Time Alone - Good for the Family

*Guest Post written by Janice

I absolutely adore my children. With that being said, I also enjoy personal time to myself. If because of the busyness of life, I skip my alone time, I can feel the negative effects in my mind, heart and spirit. There is something within me that yearns for the space and place to be solitary and do as I please, whether that is just time to reflect and meditate, take a bath or go for a run in the woods. The activity doesn’t matter so much as does the habit itself. I need this time, and as I grow more and more into my role as mother and wife, I realize how much I benefit from the act of being alone for a moment each day.